Using a flexible heatproof spatula, gently break the potatoes apart and toss in the pan. Cook, undisturbed (seriously, don’t touch them!), until deeply browned on the bottom, 5 to 7 minutes. Using your hands, sprinkle the seasoned potatoes across the surface of the pan in a relatively even layer.
Next melt four tablespoons of unsalted butter with one tablespoon of olive oil in a large nonstick pan over medium-high heat. A totally fine food, but they’re not hash browns. When going out to eat was still on the agenda, I would dive deep into a restaurant’s geo-tagged photos on Instagram and user-submitted pictures on Google Maps in advance of my visit, looking for any clue that I would get hash browns-actual, beautiful, shredded hash browns-and not a scoop of cubed, sometimes herby, sometimes pepper-and-onion-studded chunks. Diners and brunch establishments across the country play fast and loose with the phrase, placing it on their menus with abandon, and then, to my total devastation, serving breakfast potatoes instead.
If hash browns are a top-five food for you (as they are for me), being a spy online is the only way to guarantee you won’t get burned at the table. But while others may track the relationship status of their acquaintances through Venmo or cross-reference LinkedIn and Twitter to locate a dating app match, I tend to use my powers for one very specific purpose: to determine whether or not a restaurant is going to serve me a decent plate of hash browns. Like any child of the internet, I am quite good at conducting reconnaissance missions online.
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